-
Missed Connection: Eclipse Premiere
I was standing in the crowded theater, feeling so alone as I watched my friends compare bites they received from the bat cave invasion the night before. Then you caught my eye, just standing there looking like an idiot in your trench coat, but you didn’t care!
When my mom’s psychic friend, Bella, told me my soulmate would sparkle, I thought it was the 3 bloody marys talking. But there you were, your faced doused in what looked alarmingly similar to my 13 year-old sister’s glitter eye shadow, but I knew the glow was genuine, like our love. I think you were looking at me, but my vision was blurred after accidentally poking myself in both eyes with an eyeliner pencil and you could have been squinting from the bright fluorescent lights, but I ungress. No wait, I mean “degress.”
I know this sounds crazy, and my friends are threatening to remove my title as captain of Team Jacob, I just can’t stop thinking about the way you were chagrinnin’ (is that how you use that word? Oh the deep conversations we would have about the extensive vocabulary of Stephenie Meyer!) against the wall. I will drop out of school, run away from home, kill myself, come back to life, kill myself again and then we’ll get married, hug on the wedding night, 9 months later I’ll have your zombie babies and commit suicide when I see you squinting at another girl. Whatever it takes, I must be with you. Meet me at the library. You know, THE library. We’ll speak through the stacks and I’ll pretend I don’t like you.
LIP BITE
ANGST
GOODBYE FOREVER!
